Sometimes being a great friend just comes naturally. Other times, I feel it may be a bit more of a struggle because I’m doing my own thing and get out of touch. That doesn’t mean I’m a bad friend, but I want you to know I’m still here and would like to share some valuable lessons I’ve learned along the way and secrets to a great friendship.
Friends come in and out of my life at different times, and I have those few that come in early, disappear, and reappear again. So, I’ve asked myself, “How can I rekindle these friendships?” How do I reciprocate and catch up where we’ve left off? How can I be a great friend in return?
For the most part, it should just come naturally. However, there are snags in friendships just like in any other relationship. So, here are a four tips on how to be a great friend.
4 Secrets to a Great Friendship
1 – Be a Good Listener
When you are a good listener, all the world is right for your friend. Sometimes they just need to repeat the same things over and over again so that they can work it out in their own minds.
Even if they have said the same story more than once, be a good listener anyhow.
2 – Tell the Truth
If you see your friend heading for a danger zone or if you feel your friend should move on and get over a certain situation, tell them the truth but do so in kindness and in love. Gently remind your friend that by staying stuck they only hurt themselves. Chances are the person they are troubled by has already moved on and your friend is still stewing.
Find creative and kind ways to gently guide your friends to recognize the truth for themselves.
3 – Ask Good Questions
Sometime friends want us to tell them what to do while other times they just want you to listen. How do you know when to give advice or when to stay quiet. A good gauge is to ask pertinent questions.
Ask your friend what he or she should do about the situation and see if they can come up with something on their own. If not, then perhaps some good advice from the outside looking in is in order.
4 – Be Flexible
Sometimes we put so much pressure on our friends that we expect too much from them. Learn to be flexible with your friends and cut them some slack. If you have a friend who is always late, but was always there for you when you needed them, be flexible and accept this small trait.
After all, you can always tell them to meet you fifteen minutes earlier and then they may just wind up being on time. Learn to work around their flaws instead of making a big issue out of them.
So much of this is also true for our relationships with our spouse. There is a way to rebuild the intimacy through friendship and if you feel like you need help saving your marriage, you can find encouragement in the Save My Marriage program by Nicola Beer. She is a renowned marriage expert dedicated to helping good relationship grow in marriage!
Accept your friends exactly as they are so that they can return the favor to you.
So, there you have it, a couple of great tips on how to be an even greater friend. Remember to always be kind to one another. And, catching up once in awhile won’t hurt.